God has a funny sense of humor. That or God is the ultimate sadist. I’m not sure which.
The same day I published that last post questioning whether I had been used in my one night fling, the guy in question showed up on a dating site I’m on. He and I hadn’t met through a dating site though he’d been on some of the same ones as me before, just not at the same time as me.
Seeing him on the dating site was a blow to my heart. I hadn’t expected it to be so hard to see his profile show up. I was shocked to see him.
What really bothered me, though, was seeing some of what he wrote on his profile. He wrote things that were not what he had told me over the year we had been friends. I don’t know if what he wrote was outright lies or just another version of the truth. However, they were things he hadn’t told me. I suspect he told me the bigger truth and that what he wrote on his profile was a shallow way of avoiding the reality of his life. Still, it bothered me to see this different version of him.
The problem when you discover someone hasn’t told you the entire truth is that you question everything else they’ve ever told you. It makes you wonder if everything was a lie. You wonder how you could have been so gullible as to believe the things they told you.
Given what I read on his profile, now I really feel used. He certainly took the long and difficult way to use me, but his profile makes me feel like he wouldn’t be above it.
And people wonder why I have trust issues around men…