Her: I’m off to the (high school) football game.
Me: Don’t make out with any boys underneath the bleachers.
Her: (giving me a look only teenagers can give) I have a boyfriend! Besides, we’re not allowed under the bleachers.
Me: That’s because kids used to do drugs under there.
Her: No, that’s what you do behind the portables.
Me: One of the guys I dated used to have sex behind the portables when he was in high school.
Her: No, that’s what you do in the lounge. They had to take the couches out of there because they were horizontal surfaces. Aren’t you glad I know these things?
Me: Um, yes?